So another primary emotion that we experience is going to be sadness.
Sadness is something obviously we are familiar with. I would just say sadness can be different from depression, in that with depression, you have a really intense sense of sadness, but often there are other criteria that match the emotion as well, such as existing for at least two weeks, low motivation, low energy, a sense of anhedonia or a loss of enjoying things that you used to enjoy doing. Try not to be too confused but sadness is different from depression.
So when I talk to clients about sadness, often I’ll talk to them about it in a way that is framing it as there’s a sense of loss about something. Sometimes it is a very specific thing, such as the loss of a pet, or the loss of a promotion, or a person, in cases of grief. But more often than not, the type of sadness we experience throughout the day or disappointment we feel throughout the day is because we had an idea or expectation of what we wanted to happen that was not met and we’re experiencing the loss of that expectation or that idea. So I think looking at sadness from that perspective in the more kind of day to day mindset can really help with understanding yourself and managing this emotion more effectively when this is occurring.
So I should add too, knowing that sadness is not something we should shy away from. It’s obviously not something to suppress, which can be how some people understand that at times. But it is good again to just be aware of where it’s coming from. It allows you to be more curious and therefore understand it better when you look at it through this loss perspective.
So one of the ways Sadness can often help in our lives is understanding the way it can help with our emotional healing with that loss. If you think about it, there’s a can be a loss of or a lack of understanding around why we’re feeling a certain way. So if you’re appreciating or have more knowledge about why you’re feeling a certain emotion, you’re just going to manage that emotion in a more helpful way. So that’s the way in which sadness can help with the healing, is you’re able to understand why you’re experiencing it. And just that understanding in and of itself is helpful and useful and really validating.
There’s a couple other ways to help navigate sadness as well. So in addition to allowing yourself to feeling it, as I was acknowledging before, another way to navigate sadness is to seek support. Very often sadness can make us feel isolated or alone. And it can be helpful at times to reach out to others that you feel can understand you or validate you, such as friends, family, or sometimes a therapist. But providing support or receiving support from others can also help with navigating sadness as well.
And then in addition, another way to allow yourself to cope with sadness really is making sure you don’t suppress it yourself. You really want to allow yourself to talk through it at times. And sometimes it is going to be expressing it through talking to others. Other times that can happen through journaling or expressing yourself through art. Or any type of other sort of medium that can really help with letting that feeling out. Not a specialty of mine, but there is something called psycho drama. And sometimes helping through positioning your body or asking others to put themselves in a certain position a certain way can help paint the scene in real life and then have you talk about it.
So there are other ways to express that sadness other than just talking and writing. But there’s also another practice of having some type of self compassion. I think when we understand where the sense of loss is coming from, then that kind of gives us more of a sense of self compassion. So we can be less critical with ourselves. for feeling this way.
And then finally mindfulness is always going to be a useful approach when working with sadness. If only that being mindful hopefully over time helps us to become less critical and less judgmental towards ourselves or others or any other type of association that we have with that sadness feeling.
So allowing yourself to feel it, seeking support, expressing the sadness, practicing self compassion and using mindfulness, all really healthy ways to help navigate the sadness when it’s occurring. And if you have any other sorts of questions about sadness, you feel like this is applying to you please feel free to reach out to us here at Good Therapy SF.
Take care.
